Just a short story about fun, friends and food. We had a great time eating out with some lovely new friends, at a local pub. Nothing new there, other than a slightly odd experience with desserts.
Now, I continually say that I don’t have a sweet tooth. It’s not true, and I was sulking slightly because there was nothing on the menu that I fancied. With our friends having Banoffee Pie and a Cheese Board, my wife ordered her favourite – Raspberry Eton Mess. Now, there’s usually some excitement and anticipation about Eton Mess – it’s made in many different ways, and looks and tastes different depending on the chef. But this one was very different. Unless I’m very much mistaken, it was Strawberry Eton Mess. Maybe in Theale they grow raspberries with the seeds on the outside. Or maybe not. They were definitely strawberries, and not raspberries.
And I still haven’t stopped laughing about it. When someone serves up completely the wrong fruit, doesn’t even mention it, and expects you not to notice, then I think I’ve a right to tell the story. Meritology talks about being distinctive. But what this pub did made them #standout for all the wrong reasons. There are 218 pubs in the Reading postcode district (thanks to www.pubsgalore.co.uk for that statistic!), and we’ll be trying one of those next time. Maybe they’ll have raspberries in their Eton Mess. And maybe we’ll get what we ordered. Simple really.
Earlier in the week I met with John Peters @Johnpeters1531. John is famous for being a prisoner in the Gulf War. Remember him? He was the guy whose battered and bruised face appeared in photos across the quality and popular press. It turns out he was kept in captivity for seven weeks, and became a symbol of a war that divided opinion across the UK.
Yet he doesn’t rush to tell the story (despite having met royalty, chatted to Princess Diana, followed Nelson Mandela on stage, and being a major celebrity). Instead he’s a humble human being, who talks about “being bombed etc” as if that was just part of his job. He’s gone way past the bravado I might have expected from a military hero. And I loved him for it. It demonstrated a warm and likeable style that’s important for anyone speaking at The Henley Partnership @Henley_HP.
And this told me something new about value. His humility impressed me, intrigued me and interested me. It made me look for his real value; what he offers in terms of life and work experience to the business professionals we bring into our events. It made me believe that he’ll make sense, and be valuable, to the people listening. In the Gulf it was about survival, which taught John lots about leadership. And he’s turned his experiences into a relaxed yet robust framework to help leaders thrive in an environment of uncertainty. That’s not just valuable. It’s critical to the success of anyone in a leadership role.
So back to that humility. When it comes to value, showing humility “shines and amplifies” but arrogance “dulls and deadens”. I’ve seen arrogance too much lately – from junior players in cricket to senior figures in business. It makes me focus too much on the person’s style, and not enough on their substance. And if I don’t like the style, maybe I’ll ignore the substance.
So here’s my advice. Be brilliant. Be confident. Be assured. But show that humility. Even when you’re so talented that it’s hard to be humble. Your value will be obvious to everyone, and that will really make you #standout.
P.S. Meritology’s The MERIT Method℠ includes a clear focus on how value is affected by the emotional reaction of the person receiving. This blog is just one example. Please get in touch if you’d like to know more.