It’s nice to be headhunted. It happens to me reasonably often and, despite loving what I do, I’m always happy to talk. You never know when a great opportunity will emerge, and I sometimes refer recruiters to those in my expanding network. It’s part of being a “link-man” (a role I relish).
But it’s funny how every conversation makes me think of @meritology. This morning I had a quick chat, with a very bright researcher, about a very big role. Two things struck me about the call:
- They were finding out whether I could do the job. I was trying to find out about the job. The written brief was heavy on content (targets and numbers mainly) and light on context. It told me very little about the company, in terms of its culture or why it is confidently adopting such a high-growth strategy. So I didn’t glean much from the call. Maybe the researcher was poorly briefed, but we certainly didn’t connect. It felt a much too one-sided call, and that switched me off.
- There was little information about the CEO (the leader and the boss in this situation). All I gained was that he is “bright and went to Harvard’. Why would they mention that? It must be because having been to Harvard automatically makes him destined for success, a great guy, and someone with whom I’d really get along. Err, no actually. I’ve nothing against Harvard, or indeed any of the high-quality schools in the US. I just haven’t experienced any of them, so it’s hard to make any judgement either way.
So I find myself having only the following information (or assumptions) to work on – it’s a high-growth role, in an bluntly target-driven organisation I know little about, working for someone who has a completely different background to me. On balance, it’s looking like a “no” – not something I’d ever like to pursue.
What’s my fundamental point? If you’re trying to get a person interested in something, think about what would appeal to them. Get off your standard script, and have a real conversation. Work out their drivers and motivators, and explain things in their terms. And be careful what you drop into conversation – having been to Harvard is laudable, but it doesn’t light rockets and fireworks in my mind. I don’t really care. There are brilliant people here, there and everywhere.
This morning is a lovely morning. Ok, rubbish in a weather sense – howling wind, and that misty rain that makes everything damp. But great because I realise how my batteries have recharged after spending time with my family (which I did last night) and meeting brilliant #standout people (which I did yesterday afternoon). My mind has been busily dissecting and analysing the afternoon’s example; thinking about why they were so memorable, particularly given we’ve only met once. Why have they stayed firmly in my mind, as great people and professionals? It’s really simple, and let me explain.
It’s often said that “first impressions last”, so you need to manage those first few minutes when you meet someone. Actually, given how judgemental many people can be, they have probably made their decision about you in the first few SECONDS – if you doubt that, then Google “The 7/11 Rule” by Michael Solomon. But to really #standout, you need to manage your next impression and your last impression as well. And that’s what the daughter/mother team I met yesterday managed to do – subconsciously and instinctively. It was obvious that their:
- first impression was of smiling positivity, as they welcomed me into their home and business (which created connection)
- next impression was their sparky interest in my work, and how it could be applied to theirs (which created energy)
- last impression was of firm commitment to moving things forward, and making things happen (which created trust)
This all meant that our planned ninety-minute meeting lasted over four hours, and I was absolutely buzzing. What advice would I give? Practice your first impression. But be mindful that it’s your next and last impressions that create the lasting impact. The author Sonya Parker once said that:
Almost everyone will make a good first impression. But only a few will make a good lasting impression.
So focus on those three elements. Be mindful of them, when you meet new people or encounter new situations. Control them when you can. Manage them from FIRST to LAST. Because people who do that are so impressive. And in a crowd of people, and a world of many things, impressive makes you so #standout.
Like everyone else, I feel like sometimes I do a brilliant job, mostly I’m pretty good, and occasionally I’m plain lousy. But it never ceases to amaze me how, when I’m in control/in the zone/in the moment, how easily I can improve my own performance. And how I can get the best out of other people. Here’s an example.
I run the member services and learning event division of Henley Business School. We are always looking for new speakers to lead our events. And this week I met a really interesting one but, if I’d judged him on the first few minutes of our conversation, we wouldn’t be working together. First impressions were OK, but I was struggling to see how he would fit with what I do. It took quite a while before we made a connection and found an event angle he’s gone away to turn into a programme. And it’s going to be #distinctive and different, and I’m excited already!
Here were my learnings from this example. They are all about “finding the fabulous”.
- Accept that it’s your job to get the best from people. You’ve failed if you don’t, and life is so much more rewarding when you do.
- Ignore your first impressions, at least sometimes. Test whether you are right, by giving people the time to show their #value.
- Suspend disbelief (meaning putting aside your doubt or skepticism) for long enough to hear out someone’s story. Because eventually you’ll find a connection. And connected people create great ideas.
Maybe I’m smugly saying I did a great job with this guy. Or maybe he worked on me, until we found that great idea. I don’t know. And I don’t care. Either way we’re on to something. And it’s so motivating when you end up finding the fabulous. You wake up smiling at 05.00, and have to blog about it. And, for me, that’s a wonderful start to the day.